RIP 2016 Yankees

Here they lie, the 2016 New York Yankees. Their season was born with a whimper, and died with an even bigger one. They far exceeded their life expectancy, not fully croaking until September the fifteenth, killed by their arch enemy the Boston Red Sox (aided by Joe Girardi). They are being mourned by their family and friends. In lieu of flowers, please send a new bullpen to 1 E 161st Street, Bronx, NY 10451.

Okay, I don’t know what that was. But it’s over. Sorry. But yeah, the Yankees are cooked. You can look at the 2016 season one of two ways. There’s the glass half full way: “We exceeded expectations! No one expected us to make a run for the playoffs! They have so much talent for next season!” Then there’s the glass half empty way: “Yeah all those things are true, and they’re great. But we DID get to that point where a playoff spot was ours for the taking. We WERE one game out off a seven game winning streak. And we imploded and embarrassed ourselves, to the Red Sox of all people.”

I know I said there are two ways to look at it, but I’m going to break the rules here (because I live life on the edge), and be kinda split. Yes, we have a great future. Yes, this season ended up being WAY more fun than I expected, especially after what happened with ARod (what happened with ARod? Something happened with ARod? Ha ha ha ha ha). I had written them off (because I was so mad). But when two new “baby bombers” hit back to back home runs in their first MLB at bats the day after the Yankees did the most despicable thing since the fashion industry tried to convince us that Teva’s are back (were they ever in?), you can’t help but be pulled in.

Tevas, I mean, REALLY.

Every Gary Sanchez at bat was must see TV for several weeks. Every game was more fun than the next. We went on a seven game winning streak and were one game out of the wild card. “Should you be worried about the Yankees?” was a topic on every sports show and podcast. We hit a slight skid against the Dodgers, but our season ended in the ninth inning against the Red Sox on Thursday. It was the 8th inning. We were up 5-1. I was tired. “I can trust them with this lead. I can doze off”, I thought. Oh, you naive, stupid, girl.

I woke up in the middle of the night (because I always do, bladder the size of pea on this one), picked up my phone out of reflex (2016 everyone), looked at it, saw something about Hanley Ramirez and 7-5, thought “no. no way. I’m dreaming”, put the phone down, and went back to sleep. When I woke up, I was PRAYING (I’m an atheist but this is as close as I get), that I had dreamed it. I’ve dreamed way weirder things. One may have involved Joe Maddon in a situation I’d prefer not to describe, idk, IDK. I mean……..anyway…….that was the moment our season ended.

People say Joe mismanaged the bullpen on Thursday and I am inclined to believe them. Because, I mean, he kinda always does that. He did it later in the series again. Is Joe to blame for our failure of a season? No. No one person is ever to blame. Did he play a major factor? Yes. If we win that game Thursday, who knows what happens.  But a loss that bad can really fuck up a team mentally (the people of twitter voted for curse words, so the people of twitter get curse words).

I personally am in the minority of people who wish we hadn’t traded Andrew Miller. Chapman? All for it. We didn’t need him, Miller, and Betances. Plus, there's the whole "domestic violence" thing. Personally, not a fan. But here’s something that has flown under the radar since Mo retired. The Yankees organization, and possibly the fans too, have taken our closers for granted. It isn’t normal to have closers as good as we’ve had since 2011. Soriano, Robertson, Miller, Chapman. Closers as good as them aren’t easy to come by. You don’t just trade two away at once. Sure, they were trading for our “future”. But that’s what Chapman was for. And we sure as shit don’t have a future without a bullpen. Newsflash: Betances ain’t Mo. In the games that he hasn’t blown, he’s been extremely shaky. Our future out of the bullpen just concerns me. Look at the jokes Joe was trotting out the last few weeks. They made Blake fucking Parker (WHO?) look like Nolan Ryan.

So yeah, RIP. Guess I’ll root for the Cubs because Maddon went to Lafayette, so we’re basically family. Next year will be fun. We’ll get rid of some of the older guys in Tex and be able to start all the young guys regularly. Pitching will be an interesting topic considering CC, the recovering alcoholic has been one of our best. Until next year*………..

*very good chance the Yankees give me something else to blog about before the season is over. So whatever, see you then.